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Late Fall 2009 www.thedead-beat.com Volume 10 Issue 4
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Columns
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by Joanne Howard Now
every year I have tried to come up with some relevant thoughts for you to take
with you and hopefully be a comfort.
My life has been so hectic I have been struggling to arrive at the
appropriate thoughts to share.
I try very hard to let God guide me to what would be most comforting and
helpful.
So I have come up with three different sources of information for us to
contemplate. A
book “Everyday
Angels- Simple Ways to Be an Angel for Others Every day,”
by Karon Phillips Goodman, is my first source of inspiration.
The introduction of this small book talked about those “everyday
angels” that are the ones that “entered your life at good times and bad, who
have been just the godsend that you needed right when you needed it.”
It also mentions, “You’ve been someone’s angel too, when you shared
and helped and guided and loved, or maybe just listened.” The
definition that is sometimes given for an angel is “an attendant spirit.”
These attendant spirits share their peace and joy and serenity, reach out
to others without judgment, look forward and not back and finally see the best,
take it and leave the rest behind.
Seizing the opportunity that God gives us to reach out and be an angel is
not hard, but it’s a matter of “giving what you have and listening with your
heart,” as the tiny book describes. Our
everyday angels or attendant spirits were very present when we lost our loved
ones.
They were the people that guided us when we couldn’t think, provided
the shoulders to cry on and the ears to listen to us over and over again.
They expected nothing from us, but were willing to do anything we needed.
You all remember and are very thankful for these individuals.
And as we are thankful for our loved ones and all of our memories, we are
also thankful for our everyday angels.
We probably couldn’t have made it through without them. As
important as our everyday angels continue to be in our journey of recovery and
adjustment to the loss of our loved ones, another concept that I found
comforting were ornaments called “Blessing
Boxes.” They
had different keepsake stones on the boxes and messages attached.
Some of the boxes were Faith, Angel, Love, and Prayer.
But the one that caught my attention was the one called “Memories.”
Its message is one to remember and we created some ornaments.
The message said, “This gift represents memories, to be cherished every
year; A symbol of our loved ones, who no longer can be here; Hang it on the
tree, so all the world can see, that though we may be far apart, the memories
will live forever in our heart.” We
will never forget our loved one and they will always be in our heart, but
doesn’t it feel great to have something that shows the world a way that we are
remembering.
I realize that not everyone will see your box on the tree or somewhere in
your house, but those that do visit and see it may be touched by its message and
even remember their own loved ones.
Is this not why there are so many memorials in the world???
I even have my memorial corner at the funeral home in memory of my girls,
people look at it and remember them. So
in addition to everyday angels comforting us, our blessing boxes with memories
of our loved one will comfort us and maybe allow us to be an everyday angel to
someone else. Finally
a devotional in Guideposts
by Scott Walker got my attention of how we should approach life.
His message was about St. Therese of Lisieux (1873-1897).
She was a young Carmelite nun.
Due to her tuberculosis she never left the convent after age 16 and she
died at 24.
But she was considered a saint. Though
her life was confined she developed a rule for living called “the little
way.”
Simply put, “you cannot always choose your circumstances or the company
that surrounds you.
But you can choose to love each person with whom you come into contact
each day.”
Michael Novak explained, “Therese believed no matter what spiritual
darkness you find yourself in, choose as your North Star a tender love for the
persons that life’s contingencies have put next to you.”
So the conclusion to all our challenges in life may be, “simply try to
love the person closest to you.”
Let’s turn our lives to the positive even in the worst times, with love
for each other and let “this little way” guide us to better performance as
everyday angels and leave many memories for our blessing boxes.
About
the author: Joanne
Howard is the editor of The
Dead Beat.
She has been a licensed funeral director since 1992 with Pugh Funeral
Home in Golden City, MO and also the aftercare coordinator. Much of her writing
in this column is influenced by her loss of her two daughters Laura at age 10 in
1997 and Amy at age 19 in 2003.
Any comments or questions can be directed to 417-537-4412, P.O. Box 145,
Golden City, MO 64748
or email Joanne@thedead-beat.com. |
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